This photo has nothing to do with the following Blog post. I just love the Wiener Pumpe. I feel it shows what a civilized cycling town Wien is.
The heavy rains of Sunday had abated, life is for the living, and it was time to ride. The goal of the day was to find and ride the Lainzer-Tiergarten Strecke, the mountain bike route (Strecke) around the Lainzer Animal Park (Tiergarten). Simple, no? I reviewed the route on the amazing Wien cycling website and I had already reconnoitered where the Strecke intersected the little Gutenbach (good brook). So mounted on my trusty bike Scott, we set out for hijincks and adventure of the two-wheeled kind.
It was a wondrous day for cycling, all blue skies and a few puffy white clouds, almost no wind, and dry pavement. I rode my usual route up the Liesingbach Radroute, the lovely main bike path that is a stone's throw from the homestead. Turning north, I headed up into the Wienerwald on Gutenbachstrasse, a quiet lane through lush meadows.
Here is a link to a video I shot from the bike on the way up the Gutenbach:
I found my link-up spot where the Strecke joins the Gutenbach and then heads up the valley. Hurrah! I climbed the little valley, soaking up the rays and digging on the day. What could possible mar the peace of a day such as this. Oh, you poor benighted Git, you.
Tres Bon, no?
I crossed the Gutenbach just where I should, leaving the pavement and continuing up a gravel two-track. Even better, after another kilometer or so of steady climbing, I found the intersection of three trails with signs for two different Strecke. And here is where the best laid plans of mice and men went astray. I chose the path less traveled, the interesting one that seemed to go in the right direction (it didn't). A nice bit of technical uphill single track with roots and whatnot, it was a slippery mess from the thunderstorms of yesterday. Scott's tires were clawing for purchase and I was wailing away for all I was worth to help, but it was just too damn steep and too damn slick. For shame, I had to dismount and climb the steepest section on foot. But it was great, the woods were cool and dark, punctuated by brilliant shafts of sunlight. Sheer magic.
Once up the very steep section, it was mountain bike heaven, trails and tracks running hither and thither, and thus I riding hither and thither. The trail conditions were still sloppy and a good bit of mud was being added to my mien, but what better than to return from a hard ride bespeckled in the mud and debris of the forest? There was the nagging question of just where the hell am I, but I was having too much fun. And then I came to an intersection with Stadtwanderweg 6. Well, that ain't right sez I to myself. Interesting, but damn sure not where I am supposed to be. I backtracked and foretracked for a bit until I had to concede that I was so far of the route I might as well make my own Strecke. Which is what I did.
Here is a link to the Silly Man Lost in the Woods:
I wandered about, riding over open meadows atop the Wienerwald, drifting in and out of wooded patches. Now, I know, I know I should have quit whilst I was ahead, but that just ain't in me nature, Mr. Froggy. Why, if I'd a quit the many, many times I knew I should have, I would have missed out on most of what's been interesting in my life. And I'd have a few less scars too.
Now, our good Lord Buckley (Richard "Lord" Buckley 1906-1960) used to do a bit called "God's Own Drunk and a Fearless Man." I urge you to check it out. Anyway, in this tale that Lord Buckley called a "Wig Bubble" there is man, a moonlit night, and a still. The kind that makes whiskey. Not the moon, the still. There is a line in this wonderful bit that comes after our hero has had a good and healthy sampling of the whiskey that went down his throat "like honey dew vine water." See, after a few "slashes" of this stuff, he has become "God's own drunk, a Fearless Man!"
Now you know, Friends and Neighbors, I ain't had a slash of that devil liquor for going past 31 years. And I do believe it is safe to say that the world is a better place for it. But, true to say, I have been know to get good and drunk on Adrenalin, silliness and misjudgement, which is very much akin to corn liquor if memory serves. I promise you, this is all part of our story, as you will soon see. Thanks for bearing with me.
So, our hero is up on that mountaintop with that beautiful still and now he's a Fearless Man. And then he says: "That's when I first saw the bear." Uyup. I was on my own mountaintop, basking in the glorious rays of sunshine, the rightness of the world, and my innate abilities. And that, Friends and Neighbors, is when I crashed.
Now you would think that a Fearless Man, a man of innate ability, a man crossing muddy meadows and muddy forest groves, would find himself a nice soft muddy spot to crash upon. And you would be right to think it, damned if you wouldn't be right. And did I do that? No I did not. I waited until I was next to the only rocky spot for a kilometer in any direction and then, with wild abandon, I threw myself onto that rocky spot. In so doing, I banged hell out of my elbow and right forearm, adding a lovely bloody spot to my jersey, and whiplashing all of the soft connecting bits that hold the "wrist bone connected to the... arm bone." Can you hear the words of the Lord? I did. And it was the Bike God saying "Silly Rabbit, I'll show you innate ability."
And miles to go before I sleep. So, rattling and bashing down the trail (rattle-Ouch!, bash-Ouch!) I made my way back to the Liesingbach and thence to home. I washed Scott off, it not being his fault, threw my bloody kit into the washer, and then examined the damage to myself. Standing naked in the bathroom, checking out the bruised bits, quoth I: "I've had worse." Since then I've become reacquainted with the pleasures of ice packs and aspirin. And I have lived to tell the tale. I also had to take action to appease My Heart, who was less than pleased with the damage to my person.
Behold! Robo-Cyclist with his new body armor. I will live to ride another day!
Now I am just about healed up. I have my language certificate testing on Thursday and Friday. Monday will find me back out on the Strecke, trying to find out where it was I took that wrong turn.
Until then, from my rainy Garten in Wien, Ciao for Now!
No comments:
Post a Comment